I had a funeral for my feelings for him... and I buried them.
Before I buried them, I seared the hurt and betrayal with flames of fury and watched the embers of hope get eaten by hot curls of fire. I breathed in the ashes of loyalty into my lungs and coughed out the admiration that I once had. Choking on the desperation I had for his attention, I realized fading pictures of our future were burning my eyes. So I cried. Tortured thoughts streamed down my face as I released years of pinned up tension and stress. Heat from flaming lust gave me a hug, but I knew better than to indulge and all my feelings fell flat at my feet. I took the opportunity to kick them into the grave I'd been digging. Then finally... I peed on them.
Nobody goes back to retrieve something they peed on.