Conceit is a helluva drug. I often discuss the different “frog” types and I think the one I’ll discuss here is probably one of the worst—the conceited swan who started out as the ugly duckling. I think everybody has that one person on their social media timeline that maybe wasn’t necessarily a looker growing up, but they hit a development stride and did a 180 into a 10/10. This is what’s called a serious glow-up! Generally, you would be happy for this person and celebrate their confidence IF they haven’t allowed this newfound confidence to turn them into the biggest frog on the planet. Here are a few ways to know if you (hopefully not) or someone you know has let newfound physical attractiveness turn them into a narcissistic jerk.
They constantly refer to themselves in 3rd person. So alright… maybe this is more annoying than a problematic indicator, but it screams “lame with a sense of unvalidated importance”. Newly discovered good looks will lead people down this lane rather quickly because they now feel important. The sad part is that they weren’t always like this. They probably were sweet and maybe even timid.
They feel like they can now have the “pick of the litter”. Unfortunately, this is probably true for them, but their thought process is along the lines of “since I’m so attractive now, I can have anybody I want”. (Ugh… gag me.) It’s bad enough when someone is like this with no humble past, but when you were shaping up to be a decent human being and take this turn, it’s worse.
They turn into a cheater. This goes along with the previous point. Because they feel like they can have anyone they want, they no longer see the need to be monogamous. While they were probably the one being cheated on in their formative years, they step into a “payback” mode once they glow-up. This is more disgraceful than just a regular cheater because this person has experienced what it’s like to be broken at some point and now their game is breaking people.
Their dating mannerisms change drastically. So maybe they use to cater to their significant other or drive the communication effort. If it suddenly becomes hard to get a text or call back from the person, they just may be feeling themselves. It’s tough to watch someone go from an attentive partner to an inconsiderate lover. These actions are fed by the thought that now that the outer appearance is attractive, THEY must be the one catered to in the relationship.
Everybody notices the change except them. Let’s be clear. They know they’ve changed, but they are SURE it was ONLY for the better. You can’t tell someone who’s enjoying newfound confidence that they must dial it back. That’s just absurd! They’ll resist and maybe even cut you out of their lives. Furthermore, they'll probably never really notice the negative changes or the impact it's having on the people around them.
They dress differently. Maybe they were more conservative with their outfits before, but NOW they are painting the town in bold and flamboyant outfits. They welcome the new and random attention that their once modest clothing deterred. They now believe the flashier they are, the better.
Don’t get me wrong, freshly discovered confidence is a GOOD thing, but when you take it to the next level, it can be a thorn in everyone’s side. Be confident, but you don’t have to let it go to your head and make you a jerk. I’ll always celebrate a glow-up, but I’m immediately booing if I find out that the person has changed for the worst because of it. Strive, thrive, and glow up… just don’t let the frog show up!