It’s hard out here for us women with actual standards. (Well that was harsh… but true.) I’m not even talking about the super high unattainable standards. We’re talking about the common decency standards with a few additives. Some of us want someone to match our education levels while others are fine with someone that matches our financial level. We’ve been reaching for the stars personally and we just want someone to compliment our achievements. Not too much to ask, right? Of course not! However, THIS seems to be super hard to find. So much so that when we do, we cling and fight for a permanent spot in this unicorn’s life.
Some guys have gotten hip to the game and have labeled themselves hot commodities because of this. When your potential guy is “in his bag”, things can go left quickly for you. Here are 5 ways to tell if he’s using his hot commodity status to be a womanizer.
He leads with a status declaration.
This guy uses his status symbols to get your attention. He either approaches you in his nice car or is sure to flash his expensive car keys in your face upon meeting you. This is bait for you to “chase” him. He may immediately brag about travel or his career in the first conversation or drop little conversational breadcrumbs to entice you to ask about his status in some way. These are all red flags. This may just be his game for all women. Other women that are looking for someone to compliment their career/financial status may easily fall in the trap and end up pursuing him along with you.
There are drastic differences between the women he dated before and after his success.
If his taste has seemingly become shallower it’s because his tactics are attracting shallow women. He may just be flaunting his money and stature to pull a pretty face/body everywhere he goes. He’s not necessarily worried about dating women of substance and is more interested in getting his numbers up with physically attractive women. If this is the case, this is no place for you to be!
He almost immediately promises to improve your status/access.
I had a guy once tell me that he could get me in meetings with celebrities so that I could pitch my ideas. Of course, this meant I would have to travel out of my home state with him for a few days. The offer was covered in red flags for me (not to mention, there was no guaranteed meeting)! No thanks, but I could only imagine how many other victims he’d landed with his promises of celebrity access. His stories would have been convincing to someone who isn’t an eternal skeptic like myself. Something just told me that this was his game to dupe women into sleeping with him.
He’s a chronic name dropper.
In conversation, you’ll get the feeling that this guy ONLY knows people worth knowing and he’s involved with important brands, etc. While these things may or may not be true, this is probably his way of impressing multiple women to the point of falling for him. Listen with a grain of salt and try steering back to “normal” conversation over time. If he persists, you may need to hang it up.
He talks about how he spoils women.
These types of guys can’t resist telling you about financial things he’s done for another woman (to see your reaction). He wants you to jump headfirst at the thought of him spoiling you. Sadly, this works often for these guys. They share a “princess” story and women are hooked (in hopes of being the next Cinderella). He knows his ability to do this puts him head and shoulders above other guys and he uses it.
We must be vigilant when falling for what appears to be Mr. Right. He may just be a womanizer who’s mastered the art of positioning his status to pull unsuspecting victims. Use the list as a guide, but not a black and white diagnostic for determining if your potential guy may be using his status to date (or sleep with) several women.
Have you seen some of these qualities? Share your experiences!