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Esse D
- Apr 6, 2019
- 3 min
5 Ways You’ve Been Helping Your Cheating Exes
So, you’re in the boat with most of the world and you have an ex that cheated. Sadly, it’s more common than not, but it’s also common to wonder if you did something to help the cheating along. First, let me just say it’s NEVER your fault when someone else cheats on you. Let’s start there. We can do everything right, but if you’re dating a cheater, they’re still going to cheat. This is not about preventing them from cheating, but more about highlighting ways we probably made i
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Esse D
- Oct 4, 2018
- 4 min
9 Ls You Shouldn’t Take to Get/Keep a Man
They say you have to take a few losses (Ls) to get a win. (Never mind who “they” are.) The saying may be true, but the lines get blurry when you’re taking Ls at the hands of your potential partner. It’s not like we’re a generation of hopeless romantics, but somehow, we think that long-suffering seals the deal in relationships. There are certain things that you may have to compromise, but there are also some things that should be non-negotiable! Check out my list of 9 Ls you s
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Esse D
- Sep 28, 2018
- 3 min
Fighting for Love Ain’t Romantic
Usually, I shoot off a list of do’s or don’ts in regards to dating and relationships, but not today. Something more complex crossed my mind this afternoon and I decided to explore it. I’ve heard so often that anything worth having is worth fighting for, but I’m afraid we’ve grown to take that phrase a little too literally. Are we to expect that true love is prefaced by heartache and betrayal? What are we fighting for? I’ve been in relationships where I was fighting to be seen
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Esse D
- Sep 12, 2018
- 3 min
5 Ways to Tell if He’s Using His Success to be a Womanizer
It’s hard out here for us women with actual standards. (Well that was harsh… but true.) I’m not even talking about the super high unattainable standards. We’re talking about the common decency standards with a few additives. Some of us want someone to match our education levels while others are fine with someone that matches our financial level. We’ve been reaching for the stars personally and we just want someone to compliment our achievements. Not too much to ask, right? Of
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Esse D
- Aug 11, 2018
- 3 min
8 Reason’s it’s Okay to Date a Reformed Cheater
Once a cheater, always a cheater. That’s probably an unfair mantra, but for someone who’s been hurt or heartbroken from cheating, it’s a defense mechanism (one I don’t use, but hey…). One of the first questions I ask when getting to know a new guy is if he’s ever cheated on someone before. If he answers, “yes”, it’s not a deal breaker, but I do have follow-up questions. I need to know details about when it happened and the circumstances around the situation. (This is to get i
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Esse D
- Jun 2, 2018
- 4 min
7 Mandatory Rules For Staying After He Cheats
So, he cheated, and you stayed. No one’s judging you (okay maybe your close girlfriends are, but who are they to judge… right?). Things happen, and guys make “mistakes” that some of us are more willing to forgive than others. If you find yourself in the position of staying with a guy that’s cheated on you, you’re not the first and won’t be the last, but there ARE some ground rules about staying after he cheats. Here are 7 rules that you can apply to your relationship to make
46,430 views0 comments

Esse D
- Mar 28, 2018
- 3 min
What Type of Cheater are you Dealing With?
We all know and maybe have experienced a cheater at some point in our lives, but did you know that there are different types of cheaters? Yep there are different types. Some are smoother than others and some just crave a messy situation. Either way,this doesn't change the fact that they all deserve a loud and conclusive dismissal, but it's good to be able to identify the different characteristics of cheaters. I'm going to outline the 5 common types below. Opportunistic: This
2,217 views0 comments

Esse D
- Feb 24, 2018
- 3 min
I caught my friend's boyfriend cheating. Now what?
Prayers up, fingers crossed, and throw a rabbit's foot over your right shoulder in hopes that this NEVER happens. In the most unfortunate chance that it does, it's all about your approach. It can impact your energy and the overall relationship with your friend. I've seen the scenario play out a few times and thank God I've never been the one to catch my friend or family member's guy, but I've been on the receiving end of some harsh information via a friend. It's tough for bot
134 views0 comments

Esse D
- Sep 24, 2017
- 4 min
5 Things Season Two of HBO's Insecure Taught Us About Relationships
Although I'm an avid watcher of Insecure (HBO), I didn't cover ONE episode of the second season. Why? I had to digest it fully. Actually, I was still licking my wounds from the first season's finale. It didn't go may way (as most things don't), but I'd really identified with the main character (Issa) and she let me down. She wasn't supposed to be a cheater, and her and Lawrence's love was supposed to conquer all. (I know, I know... all roses and rainbows. When will I learn?)
141 views0 comments

Esse D
- Jun 2, 2017
- 2 min
Are You Punishing Your Partner For Your Ex's Shortcomings?
One thing I can say that hasn't been an issue for me, is giving every man a fair chance to build or break my trust. While not always ideal for me, I refuse to sabotage a current relationship because of the lingering actions of someone who is and should stay in my past. This isn't necessarily easy for everyone and it's totally understandable. We've all had that one person to betray our trust so badly that we've memorized all their moves (and the red flags we should have caught
542 views0 comments

Esse D
- Sep 16, 2016
- 1 min
Lira Galore Calls out black men... (Debate)
Apparently when Rick Ross's ex fiance, Lira Galore, sat down with Iyanla Vanzant on "Fix My Life", she had some things on her mind. Now I won't pretend that I watched the episode (because I didn't), but I stumbled across the statement heard around the world (okay, maybe just Twitter). "Black men don't value black women" Well, that's a mouthful and it leaves a rather bleak forecast for black women that are looking forward to marrying a "Nubian prince". Because of that, Twitter
32 views0 comments
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