I'll admit it. My finger isn't ALWAYS on the pulse of what's going on in the TV world, but I generally have an idea of what's hot. Having said that, I'd heard the buzz about the show "Black Love", but never really committed. I didn't know what to expect but hoped it would exceed any inkling of an expectation I had. Two seasons in, I decided to see what the hubbub was about and I'm so glad I did. What is "Black Love"? "Black Love" is a docu-series (created by a black couple:

Millennials get blamed for everything… sometimes rightly so. In this case, it’s not entirely our fault. Think about it, we (because I’m a millennial too) were the first generation to integrate computers (more so the internet) into our daily lives. We were comfortable in chat rooms oversharing and potentially meeting people offline to “hangout”. (Admit it, we were all dangerously close to being on an episode of “To Catch a Predator”). This was our norm growing up and it’s tric

So, one of your friends (or acquaintances) meets a guy and they get hot and heavy… FAST! You’re just like “awwww… puppy love” and then all of a sudden, they’re engaged 6 months after they met and you’re sitting there questioning if you’ve been going about this dating thing all wrong. You probably haven’t, but while some rush to judgement of the couple, others aspire to be that confident in commitment. Those aspiring to inspire commitment this quickly want to know, “What was i

Fresh onto the college scene, I was adamant about not dating a man with a child. I always wanted the experience of having a child to be the first for me and the person I was having a child with. (It’s safe to say I always dated with a purpose… for the most part.) My partner choices were intentional, and I considered everything. With that being said, I wrote off anyone that had a child because they just didn’t "fit the plan" I had for my future. That didn’t hold for long and I

When I tell you 90s sitcoms really shaped my ideas about love and relationships, I'm being totally honest! I had no examples of functional couples around me daily, so I would watch the ups and downs between all the sitcom lovers for clues as to how my love life would look in my 20s and 30s. I loved these couples and I was probably just as invested in their relationship antics as they were! I figured since it's the day before Valentine's Day and it’s Black History Month, I wou

I'll openly admit that music has been and always will be my anti-drug. (Remember those anti-drug campaigns from years ago?) When I need to sort out my feelings or just find the words to describe a situation, I turn to music. Whether I'm listening or just writing, lyrics have a way of connecting with a person's heart. It's not far-fetched to say that lyrics can shape expectations and perceptions in relationships. Love songs are the best at doing this, but sometimes we can get

As the mother of a little boy, I started thinking of all the ways I could add value to his life and what I would need to teach him while I was pregnant. I figured the typical dad stuff was covered, but what would his dad miss that would be important for me to teach him? Then the answer hit me. One of the most important things for mom's to teach their sons is how to functionally interact with women in relationships. I know some think that it's the dad's job to do that, but if

Face it... The likelihood that you've probably curved your future husband is at least at 50%. This also means the odds of you getting married is now at around 75%. (I gave the extra 25% in the event that you realize it before he's over it). With those loosely fabricated statistics out of the way, let's get down to business. There are so many marriage stories where people meet their significant others and they are nowhere close to being the package that they imagined. Some wer

Just typing the title of this post alone has me flinching as if one of my aunts is behind me about to slap the back of my head. I grew up in a very religious family and they drilled Bible verses about relationships and everything else into my head. The one that sticks out the most says, "the man that finds a wife, finds a good thing"... (with major emphasis on FINDS... as in he finds you). I have been hearing this verse from them for as long as I could even think about maybe

Finish the sentence. My potential mate has to have _______. Everybody has something to fill in that blank, but I've found SEVERAL people that have long lists of things their partner has to have, do, or be able to provide. It's easy to say what someone has to be able to do for you, but you have to think about what you bring to the table as well. Will they be equally satisfied with you as their mate? I'll give examples of common list items with responses to the demands belo

There's no problem with planning your future, but I've watched SEVERAL people obsess over a wedding before there's even a potential groom in the picture. Here's the problem with that-- the focus is obviously on the bride and the fun of getting married and not actually the marriage. Part of the reason why I don't care about and would opt out of having a wedding is because of where my focus lies. I'm more concerned about having the right mate and not the perfect dress, flowers,

It is not your responsibility to groom your partner into an adult, but it IS your responsibility to motivate them to greatness. Maybe it's a slippery slope, but I'll try to explain. The idea here is to help them develop themselves, not to poke them with a cattle prod to do what you THINK they should be doing for you. There shouldn't be anything directly self-serving about this at all. This is not a mandate to change a person's goals to yours. The point of it all is to support

Tonight is actually a fitting night to address this issue that is common enough. I discussed this with a friend a while ago and was looking for a good time to write about it. Tonight seems right because so many people try to avoid being alone on Valentine's Day like it's some sort of plague. The people with this mentality are probably the same individuals that can't seem to avoid jumping into new relationships immediately after a break-up. Don't get me wrong, I understand and

When I posted this picture on Instagram, it had already spoken to me, but it seemed to strike a nerve with a few of my followers. The overall message was meant to be encouraging to those who just got over a bad break-up with a person that was clearly all wrong for them. The issue, however, is the time between the "mistake of your life" and the "love of your life". I think it's safe to say that it's not immediately after a horrible breakup, someone comes to heal the pain and m

(This is my 2nd attempt at posting this, but I'm determined.) So I came across the above picture on Instagram and needless to say, it had some good points. First, I want to say that it's not only black men and women that are raised this way. It's problematic across the board. With that being said, I'll dive right in. I have often caught myself wondering who raised this inconsiderate, selfish, disloyal, and entitled group of men that seem to plague our generation. I have been

"It's either me or social media!"- So this must be the new age ultimatum. I've heard it so many times. I know it gets annoying to hear people talk about how "the new generation" has all these problems that our parents didn't have, but some of it has some validity. We tend to live microwave ready lives because as time goes by, things become more convenient and essentially readily available. Why not take advantage of convenience? Physical social interaction has been semi-replac

It never fails. As the holiday season approaches, you see some people scrounging to secure a "bae" or in this case... holibae. It can be a little lonely attending holiday parties and family events without some arm candy. For those that care about what others think, it can be stressful to say the least! Whatever the motive, here are 5 reasons why I'm not judging you. 1. The holidays can be SUPER lonely without a companion. The few times I got stuck at school for the holidays b

So, I watched Rob and Chyna tonight and it really made me realize something very important about relationships. Before you start to judge me, hear me out. It may seem like common sense to say that if you are damaged, you won't be functional in a relationship, but it's deeper than that. When you have deep-set self image issues that go untreated, you take it into your relationship and deflect it onto your partner. Rob is dealing with serious self-image issues because he wants t

So we've all seen the celebrity couple pictures where both people look absolutely flawless. Or we see the picture of matching Rolexes, Jordans, etc. Let's not forget the screenshots and videos that highlight extravagant gifts for someone's significant other. There's absolutely nothing wrong with any of this, BUT the common trend in the comment section of these posts is the heart eyes and ring emoji followed by the hashtag "relationship goals". I've noticed that the focus has

Apparently when Rick Ross's ex fiance, Lira Galore, sat down with Iyanla Vanzant on "Fix My Life", she had some things on her mind. Now I won't pretend that I watched the episode (because I didn't), but I stumbled across the statement heard around the world (okay, maybe just Twitter). "Black men don't value black women" Well, that's a mouthful and it leaves a rather bleak forecast for black women that are looking forward to marrying a "Nubian prince". Because of that, Twitter